get the m&m's

March 21, 2020

We are at the end of the first week of this new normal.  As I shared earlier I am writing in my paper journal every day.  At first I was writing at night but actually found more of a routine of writing in the morning with my toast and coffee before I start my work day.  I thought I would start writing and sharing here weekly highlighting bits from the past week.

I was able to get my remote work station set up at home which worked pretty well, but I found with a couple live zoom sessions that I think I need to move to a spot not quite so center in the house (right off the kitchen) and the rest of my crew can move about without being on the camera and get their snacks more freely.  I will be setting up a spot in our dining room that I think will work better.  I feel very fortunate to be able to work from home and work with such a great team.  Like everyone we are figuring it all out and uneasy about the future.

My sons were eased into online learning this week; most of the teachers were communicating their plans throughout the week and there were just a couple assignments for both of them.  For reference I have a freshman and senior in high school.  This next week they are on spring break; but then they dive in full online after that.  I tried to mirror my youngest's days at school a bit and he continue the medium they have been working on in art (stencils) and he stenciled up two pairs of jeans and a t-shirt.  He is actually quite good at it!  He watched a documentary on the 1918 Flu thanks to Amazon and made sure to do some physical activity each day.

My senior is more self sufficient and should be able to follow along pretty well but the sad reality is that he most likely will not have his senior prom or graduation ceremony.  In the bigger picture it is not a priority over the health of others but that also does not mean that he can't have feelings about that potential loss.

My state has had big increases in numbers the past couple days; I am guessing that is due to more testing being done.  As of this morning my state had about 73 positive cases and 3 deaths; the first of which was in my town for our state.  I am reading the news each day but I try not to spend too much time on my phone though and still try to be present.  It is so heartbreaking and unknown right now.

A couple thoughts/highlights to share:

  • take a walk everyday (even some of those cold rainy days like we had this week) my co-worker (aka Ursa the dog) makes sure I honor this
  • call, zoom, FaceTime family often.  A funny story, I was texting someone to check on them and obviously had the wrong number but had this sweet exchange with them- thanks stranger for this moment!
  • physically my stomach has been upset since Tuesday and I find my hands shaking on and off.  I am thinking this is anxiety and am working on techniques to help
  • being mindful of our budget and meal planning; at least once a week we will have rice and beans or other simple protein.  The grocery did not have much in the produce section, but they had some avocados so it was a nice addition and allowed me to do some dyeing with pits today
  • my husband and youngest took a bike ride and we swapped some of our backyard chicken eggs for a puzzle from a friend; porch pick ups and drop offs are great!
As I have may have hinted at, it has been a little bit of a challenging time raising our teenage boys this past year and in some ways this pandemic has somewhat allowed us to hit pause and not quite a reset but in someways us being all together like this feels different and helpful.  That being said I would never have asked for this in these circumstances and can't image the pain and grief that is and will continue to happen across the globe.  Be gentle with each other; this is surreal time.  

I will leave you with the surreal moment I had yesterday.  I needed to pick up a couple groceries and a desktop printer for my remote work.  I decided to minimize my trips to one and went to Target.  I was equipped with my gloves and stood in line to wipe down my cart at the entrance.  Once I walked in and worked on navigating distance from other shoppers and trying to find what I thought I needed the most there was all of this beautiful spring clothes and cute Easter decor and treats out.  It just seemed so surreal amongst the flurry and shortages of cleaners and TP.  Was it hopeful that there would still be spring brunches and egg hunts?  When even is Easter this year?  I saw a woman getting lots of Easter candy.  Should I go ahead and get the boys some now?  Is that the best thing for me to spend money on right now?  In the end two bags of my boys favorite m&m's were in my basket.  Definitely not a necessity, but just a little treat I thought my fellas needed right now.

Stay well everyone, love to you all -Chris

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